It seems I am peculiarly prone to ridiculous calamities. Ahem. Like the time I decided to use the automatic car wash only to discover that my sun roof leaks. Profusely. That’s right -- a continual faucet of flowing water. Inside.my.car.
My faux pas are right up there with the embarrassing yet laugh-out-loud scenarios that entice you to watch sitcoms. Yep. My life’s pretty similar to an episode of I Love Lucy. Minus the red curls. Oh, and the Cuban singer. Don’t have one of those.
It’s totally hereditary. Some sort of recessive gene that makes up the family DNA. Are you doubting? Well, it could be true. I just happen to recall that my mom backed over the heel of my foot with the car once. And my sister impaled the inside of her cheek with her s'more stick when tumbling over a tree stump at the family camping trip. And at the stage of childhood when the tooth fairy was my only source of income, I may or may not have abruptly yanked out my grandmother's loose tooth when she showed me how her's wiggled, too. I thought she might like the spare cash. I dunno.
So I suppose it wasn't at all unusual that one minute I was picking up a candle to blow it out before going to bed, and the next, my mostly asleep arm willed itself to dump liquefied wax all over the yoga mat lying unrolled on the floor. This is my life. Welcome.
This mishap-oriented gal has to have some simple stuff in my food repertoire in order to feel accomplished sometimes. For those occasions, I bust out foods with few ingredients and that don't require much cooking or baking. Essentially, dips. This guacamole recipe is sure to win you over. Even for those who succeed everywhere else in life other than the kitchen. You can do it! And you'll truly feel fulfilled when you crunch on your tortilla chip loaded with that savory green mound of garden goodness. Who knew it'd be so easy to feel like a not-failure?!
Aren't they perdy?
Easy-Shmeasy Guacamole
Food creds: Food Network: Alton Brown
Ingredients:
3 avocados, halved, seeded, peeled
1 lime, juiced
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
1/2 medium onion, diced
2 tomatoes, seeded and diced
1 Tbsp fresh cilantro, chopped
1 garlic clove, minced
Directions:
1. In a large bowl, coat avocados with the lime juice. Then drain juice
into a separate bowl.
2. Adding the salt, cumin, and cayenne pepper, mash the avocados
with a potato masher.
3. Fold in the onions, tomatoes, cilantro, and garlic.
4. Add 1 tablespoon of the lime juice back into the guacamole.
5. Let the dip sit at room temperature for 1 hour.
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